We requisition another ship, to celebrate, Juan shares out his Special Reserve and hands out cigars. When the whisky fumes ignite, the smoke attracts unwanted attention and our celebrations are interrupted by being blown out of the water. The authorities are reluctant to give us another ship so we commandeer one; Juan distributes barrels of Special Reserve to the crew. Then, offering toast after toast to the health and happiness of everyone in sight, he blows up his bagpipes and plays wild Highland reels until we’re all charging around in excitement then, when he plays the Lewis Bridal Song, yelling ‘Step we gaily, on we go, heel for heel and toe for toe. Arm in arm and row on row, all for Mairi’s wedding!’ we link arms and gallop around in circles which rocks the ship back and forth until we don’t rock back to forth again, and we capsize.
Waving goodbye to the captain and crew and, wishing them the best of luck, we paddle back to land. I shout at Juan, telling him to stop sinking things, but he blames the war and says that it’s making him twitchy. Listening to things explode, and people screaming all around us, I yell that forward and side to side seem a bit twitchy at the moment and as two of the three dimensions seem to be twitchy we should try the safety of the third and take to the air, or dig a hole, and jump in it.
Juan claims that when someone needs beautiful women and an airship, and then finds beautiful women, with an airship, they should celebrate. I agree and, stumbling across Melanie, with her Special Air Section, we do celebrate. Juan shares out his Special Reserve, then, whooping and cheering, singing wild Tzigani songs and dancing wild Tzigani dances, we accidently let go of the airship, and it leaves without us.
Professor Humperdink’s Diary