After crashing, Juan asks if Ropkind meant that his aircraft was as easy to fly as a common kite, the bird, known for its wonderful flying, or the a kite, the bit of cloth that children drape over a few sticks, following impossible to understand instructions, such as ‘strut in position’ which is unnatural, then all the kite does is spin out of control, crash upside down, and break into bits. I tell him that kites aren’t just for children and such luminaries as Guglielmo Marconi, Benjamin Franklin and Alexander Bell were all keen kite designers, and that it was Alexander, in fact, who discovered that a circular shaped kite isn’t stable.
Juan says this information is abut as interesting as a heap of numbles and, to cheer himself up, breaks open barrels of Vintage Tullibardine, Glendronach, Bunnahabhainn, and Craigellachie Private Reserve. Now, lost, befuddled, and nugatiously behind schedule, we blow up our bagpipes and, blasting out ‘Bonnie Dundee’ and ‘Farewell to Aberfeldy’ we lollop around in erratic circles, as fast as we possibly can.
Professor Humperdink’s Diary