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Hurrying up

Scandalously behind schedule, with evening drawing in, exasperated by England’s incredibly slow and uncomfortable public transport system, I commandeer a balloon. This will speed the journey up considerably. To celebrate, I break open a barrel of the Macallan, followed by barrels of Vintage Strathisla, Cardhu and Strathisla Special Reserve. After offering toast after toast to a successful flight, we launch into the evening sky and, yelling with excitement and screaming with fear, we ride the dark wind, as fast as we possibly can.

Professor Humperdink’s Diary