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Leaving Aberfeldy

We have a wonderful time in the Cheeky Monkey but, after few days drinking, gossiping, dancing, singing and brawling, things become a bit fuzzy. At some point, we remember that we are glunderingly behind schedule and head for aunt Humperdink’s Aberfeldy airfield to pick up an aeroplane.

After fortifying ourselves with Vintage Jura, Dalmore, Glendronach and Ardmore Special Reserve, Juan decides to take the American Eagle; I refuse to fly in the same aeroplane as Juan and choose the Stearman, with a ‘Whirlwind’, two-hundred horse power engine. Juan then says the Eagle only has a ninety horsepower engine and he’s not going to fly an aeroplane that slower than mine. I tell him that the Eagle is lighter than the Stearman, and its Curtiss OX-5 motor is perfectly adequate, and I remind him that it’s not the size of the engine that matters, it’s how it’s used. He says that it doesn’t matter how it’s used, ‘adequate’ is never good enough, and says he’ll take the Curtiss Hawk instead as it has a V-1550 motor with 445 h.p. I tell him he’s being pathetic and choose the Keystone XLB-6 that, with two Wright R-1750 radials of 525 h.p. each, is twice as powerful as Juan’s Hawk. This results in a violent brawl about the merits of various engines, during which we both grab an aeroplane at random and, screaming and yelling, chase each other through the sky as fast as we possibly can.

Professor Humperdink’s Diary